Dani's approach was to explore my dark emotions by encouraging me to talk about my wife, how we met, how we lived, my feelings during the last days of her life, immediately after her death and my fears for the future without her. Dani was very positive, realistic and practical, but at the same time very casual and easy going, always cheerful. I found it very easy to be open and honest about my feelings and fears. She gave me various mechanisms to use when the dark moments overcame me, mechanisms I still use. Dani assured me that it was OK to take time out to grieve, there is no time scale to grieving and there is no cure, but when the time is right I would move forward at my own pace. She explained the stages of grief, she frequently told me, to be kind to myself, to ease the natural feelings of guilt and fear of the future.
Sixteen months after the death of my wife I am very slowly building a new life and I look back at the counselling with Dani as the moment I started to look forward, but as Dani explained, everyone is different and for me it is a slow process with challenges every day and although I will always love my wife, I do believe a new life is possible."
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